Cricket's MBV *Spoiler* Review

[shanrocks]

Ok kids, I saw My Bloody Valentine 3-D last night and under the cut is my **VERY SPOILERY** review.  To read my non-spoilery review GO HERE.

First an foremost, I want to say that I went into this movie already knowing who the killer was.  And although it spoiled me for the thrill of trying to figure out who the bad guy was, it did not spoil me for the ending...if that makes any sense, lol.

The 3-D element did not disappoint.  In fact, I highly recommend seeing the movie in 3-D to get the full frightening experience.  Having said that, if you have a weak stomach, do NOT see this movie.  Yes, as stunningly beautiful as Jensen Ackles is in gigantic 3 dimensions (and very much worth every cent of the ticket price), even his gorgeous self can't counteract the sheer goriness and shocking imagery this movie does not hesitate to throw right in your face (literally).

As far as the acting goes, one does not expect much from a straight-up popcorn flick slasher film, but I have to say that the actors (for the most part) were very believable, and if they didn't keep you guessing as to who the killer was, then they surely made you believe they were terrified as the masked pickax killer descended upon them.

Now for the SPOILERS....

I knew it was going to be a helluva gory ride through this entire movie after watching only the first 10 minutes of the film.  Throughout the movie, you see decapitated corpses, chest cavities hacked open, real human hearts hidden inside red heart-shaped candy boxes, eyes flying at you from being pierced by a pickax, jaws being ripped off....let's just say the movie very much lives up to it's title.  My Bloody Valentine indeed.

Kerr Smith, who plays Sheriff Axel Palmer was downright awesome.  Although, anyone who is in love with Kerr will NOT be in love with his character.  Bottom line: he is a cheating douche bag.  He made me hate him from the very minute he stepped on screen.  His acting was great because if I didn't know who the killer already was, I would have believed it was Sheriff Palmer.

Amazingly, I actually liked Jaime King who plays Sarah Palmer.  She wasn't your run-of-the-mill dumb bimbo chick in a slasher movie (but believe me, there were plenty of others in this film).  She actually kicked ass and as much as she ran from the killer, she fought back too and got some "You go girl!" hits against the murderer.  I enjoyed watching her and Jensen on the screen together.  They made you wish the two of them would be able to just come together and live happily ever after.

And then there's Jensen Ackles.  Ahh, Jensen, Jensen, Jensen.  Nowhere in this movie did I see Dean Winchester, and it kind of threw me for a loop.  Tom Hanniger is one very confused, very frightened, very angry, and very bitter mixed up guy.  And up until the very end you didn't know whether to root for him or want to run away from him.  Jensen has the best scene in the entire movie.  His acting in the ending will blow you away!  His facial expressions say so much without him uttering a single word.  To go from believably confused, to evil, to innocent, all in a matter of 5 seconds, all while not speaking a sound, takes some maaaaad acting skills.  When you finally realize that Tom is indeed the killer (and holy shit!  OMG! Jensen is the killer!), you don't know whether you want to shoot him yourself or give him a giant teddy bear hug.  You'll see what I mean, lol.  It is absolutely amazing.  The hands down most awesome scene is when Jensen/Tom is walking down the mine tunnel with pickax in hand and as he passes the ceiling lights, he knocks them out one by one with the pickax, and as the sparks fly, for a split second each time you see him in the miner's mask and full murdering attire.  It is SO FREAKING COOL!!!

If anyone has doubts as to if they'll like this movie or not, my advice to them is just go into the theater to have a good time.  Don't expect anything more than a mindless, gory, whodunit slasher flick.  It doesn't pretend to be anything else.  Don't be surprised to see stupid people running slowly, tripping and falling, walking alone in the creepy woods, lots of "F" bombs (and holy crap, to hear Jensen say "fuck" made me LOL), naked chicks, and blood, blood, blood.  This movie is not going to win any Oscars, but it just might be enough scary fun to keep you entertained for about an hour and a half. :)

Comments

[pearlzilla.livejournal.com]

Well, this is exactly what I told my friends the Chinese J2 fans: This movie is not going to win a Oscar, but it did exactly what it sets out to do- give viewers 100 minutes of horror and thrill and fun.

Jensen is excellent in the movie, he played a very believable mentally disturbed Tom. And you are right he is definitely not Dean. I loved the finally showdown in the mine, and the finally scene. With no words, his facial expression said it all.

I like Kerr Smith and Jamie King's performance too. The only one I found a little cheesy is actually Tom Atkins (the ex-sheriff). For some reason the way he talks bothers me a little. Too slow and too theatric? Especially when his head is framed with that bloody heart at the beginning.


Well, sorry I ranted so much. Shutting up now ;P

[cricket52579.livejournal.com]

No, you're right! I thought I was the only one that cringed a bit at Tom Atkins' performance. I'm not familiar with his other work, but he did seem to act a little over the top and his timing was a bit...off.

But other than that, I don't really have any major complaints. I was just fun and gory grossness that made me watch most of the movie from behind my hands, lol.

[pearlzilla.livejournal.com]

There is a few things I am not very clear about the plot. I think I was too distracted by all the blood and gore and Jensen :) Maybe you can help me.

I think they want viewer to believe Tom is mentally disturbed and the killings are more or less spontaneous instead of just a cold blood killer who planed all the murders, right? So I am a little confused about the timeline here. Tom learned Harry's bury place after the motel killing. where did he get the miner suits and the axe? The bag he carried at the time didn't seem to have all that. And he planted all the heart shape box in that old house? That is too clear headed planning to me.

[cricket52579.livejournal.com]

Yes, Tom was mentally unstable. I believe Sheriff Palmer got the call from his deputy saying that Tom had been in a mental institution for the past seven years.

And I don't think even Tom knew he was the killer until the very end. He believed the killing spree was only hallucinations and that he was actually seeing Harry Warden kill all those people, when in fact, it was Tom himself.

I think Tom found the burial place of Harry Warden at the very beginning, before any of the killings started happening again. That's where the mask and pickax came from.

And as far as all the heart-shaped boxes in the cabin, I'm not sure if Tom planted those (if he did, he probably didn't remember doing it. Half the time he wasn't in his right mind) or not. I don't remember what Axel said when Sarah confronted him about the heart boxes.

[pearlzilla.livejournal.com]

I think when they did the review of the past, viewers were supposed to understand what happened from the beginning. But at that point I was way too distracted to connect all the dots :-)

Thank you for clear that for me.

[cricket52579.livejournal.com]

No problem. Glad I could help. :)